smile

gold hues

wispy clouds

we’re chucking donuts

(our favorite kinds)

off the jones’ memorial

when I’m with you

I feel like a kid again

living deep
without thinking about

time

bright afternoon

the release of

closing my eyes

lost in melody

with an old friend

saying nothing

drinking soda from bottles
light flickering through bare trees

driving home

tonight

I want you to

know

that I see this is painful

your eyes were down

and I wanted to just

hold your

shaking hands

free

I think the beauty of this is that

it is beyond us

in a way that is causing us to open

freeing

both pain and love

and maybe now is about

focusing on that
focusing on

freeing more pain

freeing more love

deeper

I needed to give

beyond what I thought

possible

so I sat on the floor

and remembered your

heart

the pause

grinding coffee

you met my glance

gently asked me to talk

tears brimming and red-faced

I confessed my pain

the pressure

how much I care

I needed to be heard

wanted to be open
however raw and unkempt

and you

you listened

you shared the weight

your beautiful heart

paused for me

communion

this time

it will be more than a taste

this time

it will surpass

shifting emotions or what I see as reality

this time

I will swallow the bread

take you in

and claim

that you have always been

enough

I love you

for the fragments I offer

for

my feeble love

I am

swelling into something

spacious

into a life mended

by the spirit who

never

gives up

liar's paradox

when i apologized on the phone
she said everything to deny my wrongdoing
but we never talked again
cause i think she finally saw the truth in it

i wish i didn't tell her
because it was only true once i said it

give

i can give
up dreams
but i can't stop
giving
love.